First of all to any friends or family members reading this, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being distant, ignoring you, not calling, not being involved in your lives, not responding to messages, and mostly for just not being your friend when you needed one.
Depression is something that doesn't like to go away easily and although I am working on it, the hardest thing has been to remember to stay in touch with others. The good news is that I do seem to be getting better.
I was on the depression medication for a month and when I ran out I never bothered to make another appointment to the doctor. In general this is usually a bad idea, but I knew this meant I really had to exercise more to get the same effect. I went to see the psychologist which wasn't at all like I thought. I imagined I would tell them my life story and they would provide the advice of what to do. Instead we discussed the things that I hoped to achieve by meeting with a psychologist, what would be a sign I was getting better, and the underlying thoughts of my anxiety. After that I finished the 7 Habits book and somehow the motivation just appeared. I don't really know why, but it's like I woke up one day and just decided "I think I'll start doing stuff again."
Am I cured? Certainly not! I am getting better and no longer feel the anxiety I used to, even in difficult situations. I am also motivated to do lots of things again and found myself very busy doing tasks around the house and other things I haven't gotten around to that needed to be done. Having motivation again has been great although it has reminded me of all the things that need to get done that I have been avoiding. I still have a long way to go, but at least now I feel I am on the right path.
Now as for other things, here is a short list of last month (since I use this as a diary too):
- Argentina Fingerprinting: I got my police check documents completed but I am looking for someone in Argentina to send them to. They have to be physically turned in by hand by someone I authorise.
- Talk on Family History: I gave a talk in church on my family history and how because of our ancestors, we are where we are today. I did A LOT of reading for it and I think in the end I gained more from it than anyone else.
- Family History Activity: We had a family history activity that night after I had spoken in church and I was bummed that only 2 other members (one family) showed up, but at least that meant I got to eat lots of the yummy scones Flavia had made!
- Cinnamon Rolls - YUMM! What more needs to be said? I will say that this was the first batch I had made in a long time and was pleasantly surprised that although the dough wasn't rising properly the rolls still turned out great.
- Bluetooth Audio Books - I bought a Bluetooth hands free device for my car and I have been using to stream audio books from my phone. It has been awesome listening to conference talks in the morning and then other books in the afternoon. I just completed Sophie's World and have just started the Eye of the World (I've read up to book 7 in the Wheel of Time series, but I figured I'd start from the beginning for audio books).
- Stake Youth Activity - The Hunger Games: Our stake had a huge activity/dance for all the youth where they were divided into group and went through various games including darts, sack races, bobbing for apples, etc. to earn points. At the end of the games they had dinner and a big dance. Jaydene, Matt and I helped out with the games. It was a huge success and I feel all of our youth had a good time in the end including our two new young women!
- New Young Women: We had a family move into our ward with two young women; Katie and Jessica. They have really boosted morale for everyone as now we have a bigger group and no one has to worry they will be the only girl to show up for mutual! It was a huge answer to prayer. We made lip balm for one of the mutuals and although the lip balm didn't turn out that amazing (I learned it's hard to get quantities perfect), it was fun and messy. We also did a big Christmas in July party (American style) with roast turkey, honey baked ham, chicken, roasted vegetables, rolls, and apple pie for dessert. It was fantastic!
- FHE with the Laugery's: We had a fun night with the Laugery's in our ward. Somehow we ended up watching part of a documentary on the Sasquatch, but it was fun and I'm glad we are able to be able to spend time with friends.
- Drive-In Movie - Mission Impossible: With our other friends Dean and Crystal we went to a drive-in movie theatre to see the new Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation. Matt had never been and wasn't sure how it all worked. He asked me "how is this a social thing?" I tried to explain, but as it was a cold night and we sat in our warm cars I guess it didn't seem like much of the big social drive-in experiences that I used to have in Utah and Oregon. They also don't have movies back to back like I went to in the states, and you still have to pay per person so it's not that cheap either. It was still fun and the diner had great food.
- Jaydene's Farewell: We had a large break the fast at Jaydene's the Sunday before she left to Spain. She will be there till mid-September doing research and some other touristy stuff. So far it has been interesting running Young Women's by myself. All the youth decided to help out teach the Sunday lessons and as this is the month for the chastity and dating lessons I am interested to see how it all works out. I miss Jaydene, but I'm grateful for my girls that are helping me out while she is away!
- Shade has conjunctivitis: Since Shade got home from the vet he started to have a squinty eye once in a while and then it started tearing a lot. After a couple of weeks we took him to the vet and they gave us a cream to put in his eyes. It is a lot better and less red, but it has not fully gone away. Poor squinty-eyed Shade!
- Ice Skating: Yesterday Matt took me ice skating. He made me dinner when I got home and then we went to Penrith to ice skate. It was a nice date night, which is a rare occurrence for us. The only problem was that I am so out of shape that I got lightheaded from going around the rink really fast and had to quit early.
- Selling Laptop: I am selling my laptop and replacing it with a Surface 3. I finally got overly frustrated with using a PC all day at work and switching to a Mac at home and realised I didn't even need a full laptop anymore. I've been trying to back up my files to an external hard drive and it is taking FOREVER! Mac puts all your original photo files into mini folders so unless I want to copy all the folders I have to individually open them all to copy the files. Thank you for making the process as difficult as possible Apple.
- Sewing Endeavours: As my motivation has increased so has my hobby involvement. I sewed an invisible hem on some dress pants that didn't turn out perfect, but it looks good enough for my first time. I later bought an overlocker (called a serger in the US) for 50% off and was wishing I had bought it before I did the hem. I still haven't read the book to learn how to use it yet though, but I have a lot of new projects to try.
That pretty much sums up my month! I am keeping myself ridiculously busy, but loving it. Life is good for the most part, but I could do for some warmer weather already because it is FREEZING!
