This seems to be a time for self reflection and discovery. I have been reading and thinking about a lot of things lately. Lately I have had a lot of feelings of despair and sadness. I feel as if I work so hard to minimise my flaws, but the reality is they are always there. Additionally, I constantly feel lonely even when I am with loving people. These feelings will pass, but it has lead me to realise that I always seek joy and happiness externally instead of internally. Now I just need to find that joy within myself....
Below are 10 quotes from things I've heard or read recently that have been enlightening or useful to me that I wanted to share.
"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results." Unknown
"Our thinking another person is 'the problem' makes us 'the problem'." Justin Coulson, 21 Days to a Happier Family
“The joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives." Russell M. Nelson, October General Conference
"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." Aristotle
"We make our family happier by making ourselves better." Justin Coulson
“Perfection' is man's ultimate illusion. It simply doesn't exist in the universe.... If you are a perfectionist, you are guaranteed to be a loser in whatever you do.” David Burns, The Feeling Good Handbook
“There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you.” David Burns
“The more people we can find to agree with our side of the story, the more justified we will feel in believing that side of the story.” Arbinger Institute, Leadership and Self-Deception
"Children do better when they feel better" Jane Nelson, Positive Discipline
“One of the best ways of becoming an effective parent—or, for that matter, an effective human being—is to understand the perceptions of other people, to be able to “get into their world.” Jane Nelsen, Positive Discipline: The First Three Years: From Infant to Toddler
SAKURA
Sakura LOVES singing and will often randomly sing the ABC's, the baby shark song, or some other nursery rhyme. This often happens at the top of her lungs as well.
She also had some really fun play dates and got to meet some baby rats. She asks about her friends "Nano" and "Sahra" on a regular basis.
We also went to a public pool in Newmarket where they have some water slides and lots of areas for the kids. I went there once when Sakura was much younger. She loved it! After going down with her on the slide, then holding her hand, then going down just before her, she finally gained the confidence to go down herself. I just sat at the bottom and caught her and then let her get out and go do it again. I eventually got her to actually swim a little to me at the end. I was so impressed! Unfortunately I have no pictures or videos as I was by myself.
SEWING STUFF
I finished a blanket for a lady that had her baby ages ago. And I finally finished my dress I was working on with Brianna. As you can see in the picture. It doesn't fit. I went to a seamstress that helped me with my sister's bridesmaid dress and she basically said to cut the top off and redo it. :( Can't say I'm motivated for that! I also am finally finishing a red skirt I started for Halloween last year. I made many errors, but was determined to finish. One error was so bad though that I had to unpick a lot and redo it. Oy!
In case you are wondering, we did nothing for Thanksgiving, but I did make Turkey sausage patties and cauliflower mash in honor of the event. It tasted much better than it looks.
Matt works 70+ hour weeks still so not much to report there. Matt randomly was able to get some cabinets from a job sight. He painted it them and one has moved in to where Shade's cat tree was. Feng shui is real! It felt so good having some of that stuff tucked away.
We have had some interesting events though with our shade sail falling down because the small metal pole holding it up snapped in the wind. Also, there are lots of fires going on as we are experiencing a drought. We are lucky nothing has happened around our area but they have banned open fires multiple times in the last month or so.
CHRISTMAS PLANS
This year has proven to be a memorable Christmas season already. My ward Christmas dinner and talent show proved to be more eventful than I had thought. The week of my friend Kate asked me to participate in a skit for the event. I was struggling with a lot of anxiety and depression but agreed anyway and it was just what I needed. It was totally out of my comfort zone but we had lots of fun practicing and it turned out well I think. We did a synchronized swimming skit. At the beginning when we jumped into the "pool" I did not have padding since all the mattresses were too far down. I still did the jump and roll but landed with a big thump on the hardwood stage and received a bruise on my lower back and tailbone that took a few days to heal. Could have been much worse, and it was still totally worth being a part of. Thank you Kate!
We expact to have a fun Christmas this year. I overspent on gifts (Facebook Marketplace, Aldi, and Costco are not safe for me to browse). I have no regrets just feel sorry for the other people I had originally intended to give something that won't. We were also invited (or kind of self invited) to a friends Christmas where the requirement is I must be willing to sing and play lots of board games. Sounds like my kind of party! As I won't post again till after the holidays, Merry Christmas everyone!
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| Slightly updated version in case you saw the original. |
