Thursday, March 18, 2021

Adjusting and Growing

 It has been a whirlwind of a month. I could just highlight events, but this month I think it is pertinent I include the things I've learned as well. 



Lesson #1: It is IMPOSSIBLE to be in PERFECT health

Poor Azalea has had similar gut issues, and health difficulties as Sakura had. She had an awful nappy rash that went away but then got eczema all over her body. The worst area was her neck. I was told to regularly moisturise, and that helped it go away, but then it would flare up again. My suspicion is that there are things in my diet that are inflammatories for her, but I have not figured out what. I have been gluten and dairy-free since birth, but then I cut out chocolate, eggs, and more. The results have not really made much of a difference. I decided to get additional help beyond the doctor. I consulted with a clinic the specialises in nutrigenomics. They suggested I was getting too many oxalates in my diet. Guess what has a lot of oxalates - almonds and other nuts. We try to be mostly paleo so we eat a lot of almond or cashew based foods. We also have a lot of smoothies which we put probiotics, and green food mixes into, and of course, berries also have a lot of oxalates. It was a depressing consultation. After that, I just felt there was no way of winning. It is obvious to me gluten and dairy on a regular basis harm my body, but oxalates now? 

Later I spoke to a naturopath who prescribed some homeopathic remedies for me and bub. It helped, and her health issues seemed mildly improved. She also mentioned it may be beneficial to stick to a diet that is easily digestible - no eggs, corn, red meats, etc. I felt like at this rate, no matter what I ate, it wouldn't be good for me or bub. Not to mention it is stressful when your diet is so limited, and it's hard to find things you actually enjoy eating. For now, I am going to avoid anything I am certain is negatively affecting Azalea's health. I think when I am done breastfeeding, though, I am just going to go back to eating whatever for special occasions and social events. We will aim to not eat anything in excess and still avoid processed foods. There are a lot of things that can negatively affect our health, so I think we will just do the best we can and deal with the negative consequences as they come. 


Lesson #2: It never hurts to ask

A couple times this month, I got four hours of sleep or less at night. I learned years ago that research has equated less than 6 hours of sleep to a form of torture (Click here for more on that). So my baby is essentially torturing me. One night is survivable, but multiple nights and my brain is sludge. I have two jobs and just started my university research project, all of which require significant brainpower. I felt so alone and miserable. Most I knew were too busy or unavailable during the day. I decided to reach out to my local community Facebook page. To my surprise, I had many mothers that reached out and were willing to watch my newborn. Even after I posted "I found someone to help", I still had some message me that they'd be happy to help out another time. I was overwhelmed with how kind and caring people were. A part of me hesitated because I had nothing to give in return. What if they felt I was taking advantage of their kindness? Or, what if they felt my need for sleep wasn't a good enough reason? I was overanalysing it and, in the end, realised what does it matter if they were the ones that volunteered? It doesn't hurt to ask. In my case, I got two wonderful women from my neighbourhood to help when I desperately needed it. I could not have functioned without their assistance. 


Lesson #3: It's ok to say NO

I love helping people, but sometimes I take on too much for myself. I pride myself on being the kind of person that is reliable and trustworthy. So, when I say I will do something, I will bend over backwards to do it. Over the years, I have gotten better at not taking on more than I can chew (it may not seem like it at times). Usually, I can get everything done, but I forget to allow time for things to go horribly wrong. Like when I try to go to an appointment, and although I planned to leave with plenty of time, this is when the baby decides to vomit on the outfit she is wearing. After the new outfit goes on, more vomit. By the third outfit, it just seems like the universe is against you! I came to the realisation that it had been a rough week, and I was behind in my normal obligations. Although I felt like a failure, I reached out and had to cancel something I had committed to doing. It worked out fine in the end, and I learned that it was ok to say that I couldn't do it in the end. 



On to some other fun adventures in the last month. 

We went on a hike from Kings Beach along the coastal cliffs to Moffat Beach. It was lovely, but I didn't enjoy the scenery as much because the rocks were slippery and required me to watch where Sakura and I stepped. It was a beautiful day for it. Sadly, the clouds did not protect us from the sun, and poor Azalea got a little burned on her arm and leg that was exposed. Parenting fail! 


The non-baby carrying group

We went to Sea World again for their Carnivale night. Sadly we didn't arrive in time to feed the stingrays, but Sakura still got time to try to touch them. My favourite was just catching up with the good friends we went with. 



I also went to a play centre with Sakura and Azalea and to chat with a friend. To my surprise, Sakura was happy to go play by herself the majority of the time. This was such a relief as Azalea had to be held the whole time. After my friend left, I couldn't get Sakura to leave! She just wanted to go down the slide all day, it seemed. This was also her first time with me paying for the coin cars. I'm not sure she got the hang of it. 



One day I took Sakura and Azalea with me to recycle some bottles for cash. I had never done it before, so one of the attendants helped me dump my massive bag of bottles into the sink to sort. Sakura had a great time helping put them on the conveyor belt. I was glad I brought the milk crate we had with bottles in it. It ended up being the perfect stool for her to stand on!



Sakura has also continued doing Joy School. I haven't seen her get much better with sharing, but it's funny seeing her become the demanding hostess every time it's our turn to host. She loves to tell everyone what to do and where to sit. Hmmm... inherited trait from me perhaps? 

Joy School Fun

Matt and I have had the benefit of doing some date nights. We haven't had proper date nights on a regular basis for a long time. A friend has been able to watch the kids while we go to play volleyball at the stake centre (church building) on Friday nights. It has been AMAZING! Not only do I get some exercise in and feel good, but I also get all the nostalgia from playing volleyball in Utah when I was younger, Matt and I get some alone time to chat to and from the chapel, AND I feel a lot closer to him by learning to play with him. Quick shout out to my dad for my awesome AVP outdoor volleyball. It's everyone's favourite ball, and they are always sad we leave early and take it away. 


Games night: Rummikub and WandaVision

Last week we went to a fun museum night instead, and I won the limbo challenge! I was one of the shortest and youngest people there, so not much to boast about, but I did win cool pineapple glasses! 

Me doing limbo

Matt had his birthday on the 9th, and I made honey baked ham for him, of which we just finished leftovers. Sakura and I painted his birthday present. I was bummed Sakura later painted my cherry blossom tree. I bought him an ice maker, so he can stop filling all our freezer space with ice for ice baths. He still hasn't used it. 







Other Stuff: 

The new skirt I made and Sakura has a matching dress.

Current house progress - slab hopefully being poured the 22nd.

Azalea enjoys the water.

We have had some ups and downs for sure this month, but each time I see Azalea gives me a big smile, I figure life can't be too bad. Sakura has also continued to be the ever-loving big sister and sometimes a little too much. Like the time's Azalea sleeps and Sakura HAS to touch her and wake her up... Oy. Yet seeing them sit together and watch something is adorable. 






Sunday, February 7, 2021

Life Changes and Water Fun

I am way behind on life updates, but to avoid an extremely long post and spending three hours writing and editing, I have omitted some details. This will likely be the case for all blogs moving forward. I now keep a journal almost daily elsewhere so this blog is more of an overview and fewer details. 

The New Addition:





Baby Azalea Lotus Rose arrived 29th of December at 11:44am. She was 3.480kg, Head 33cm, Length 49.5cm. To sum it up with approx times:

4:00am     Was that a contraction? Couldn't be, it's too early, and I am hosting a murder mystery party tonight.

5:00am    Definitely contractions (confirmed on Google, not Braxton Hicks). Started timing.

5:30am     Contraction timer app says contractions are 3-4 minutes apart and should go to the hospital. Began packing for the hospital and getting ready. Called Jennis to have her come watch Sakura and provided unfortunate news that I can't host - still offered the house)

6:00am     Woke up Matt, who then slowly preceded to get breakfast before we left.

7:30am      Confirmed 5cm dilated, baby in the ideal position.

8:30am      Contractions A LOT more painful - received gas machine for pain. This resulted in getting really lightheaded and vomiting.

9:00am     Asked for epidural and waited, and waited, and waited. They needed blood test results before moving forward because I had low platelets.

10:00am     All good and received epidural. Finally, some rest and pains were bearable again.

11:40am    Midwife came to check on me and my water broke. I was asked to push to get any excess out, and the baby started to come! One more big push and out came baby!

I was able to happily hold and feed her for nearly three hours before they even weighed her. After she came, I had a lot of energy. I was doing so well they discharged me by 7pm so I could go home.

Since birth, we had a week of a happy, sleepy baby. Now she is a fussy baby with allergic reactions to my milk, will take 2 hours to go to sleep, had a bad nappy rash (whoops!), and has eczema on her face. I'm ok but finding it a challenge to work and do things with Azalea constantly strapped to me. I could use more baby-free time on occasion, but I lack practical support without having family here, and my friends are too busy. On the bright side, Sakura loves Azalea and will often help get me things I can't reach for. She also understands if I can't do something because I am feeding or holding the baby. Matt has also been helpful by being the regular cook and will hold Azalea when I need a break.









We Are Building a House:

Around November we suddenly decided to buy a house and, after much research, settled on a land/house package. Here's a summary of that:

1. Found support to help us navigate the process: Shaun and Jasi with EasyPropertySolutions (mutual friends) and a fantastic mortgage broker Gayle Stapleton with Stapleton Finance
Please don't judge! It's not perfect, but we are happy
with what we came up with as it meets our needs, 
many wants, and suits the land. 

2. Needed Matt's citizenship to qualify for builder's grant. E-mails pleading to expedite the process were unsuccessful - had Matt randomly attend the last citizenship ceremony of the year that I found out about. SUCCESS!!

3. Found a plot of land in Burpengary big enough to actually have some yard space! I signed the contract the same day we heard it opened up.

4. After vetting four different builders and trying to sort the perfect floorplan - finally went with the recommended builder from Shaun and Jasi - Thomas Paul Constructions. Many e-mails later, Matt drafted what he wanted, and the draftsmen recreated Matt's floorplan with a few adjustments.

5. Oh wait... need tax returns to apply for the loan. Lots of waiting, and some odd complications later, we finally received the documents just in time.

6. Concerns over the inclusions and building contract created more delays. All sorted just before the holidays! Whew!

7. Loan was approved the beginning of January!

8. Land settlement occurred 4th of February. Just now working on build approval and details.

It was a ROUGH couple of months sorting this all out in time to get all the government grants, but against all odds, we managed to get Matt's citizenship, qualify for the grants, find a plot of land that wasn't tiny, create a suitable floorplan, and get approved for the loan. I couldn't have done ANY of this without my awesome support team: Shaun, Jasi, and Gayle! Not to mention TPC Constructions and their staff have gone above and beyond to help us sort this in such a short timeframe.

Christmas Time:

Before Christmas, we spent a few days hitting all the theme parks: Wet N Wild, Sea World, Movie World, and Paradise Country. We stayed at an Airbnb nearby and had four days of fun. Sea World and Wet N Wild were the best because it was HOT!

Movie World

Paradise Country

Paradise Country

Wet N Wild




Christmas was wonderful as we went and visited some friends we hadn't seen in ages! Sakura got to play Mary in a nativity re-enactment and was a bit too distracted playing with a doll. She also refused to let anyone touch or hold baby Jesus (played by a stuffed teddy bear). We spent the day eating lots of yummy food, including roast lamb, lots of salads, and more. I was grateful I was still eating gluten and dairy at the time. The majority of the time we spent enjoying the pool and Sakura had a blast! I just enjoyed spending time with a good friend and relaxing in a pool where my large belly wasn't weighing me down.






After Christmas, we had some enjoyable times at home before Matt went back to work. We set up the pool, our new hammock, and a swingset I got for Sakura's birthday.





Pool Parties:

On Australia Day we went to a fun public pool party, and Sakura enjoyed swimming and getting tossed in the water. I was bummed the indoor pool was closed, but luckily a friend held Azalea, so I could enjoy some swimming time too.


Another public pool party was a week ago, and this one was even better! They had an inflatable slide into the water, jumping castles, water hockey, lawn games, dancing contests, ice cream food trucks and more. It was mostly better though because they had a big outdoor pool covered that was deep enough for Sakura to swim in without me assisting her. So I held Azalea in a sling and could get in the water partially while monitoring Sakura. I will definitely revisit both these pools.





Last weekend we went to a different pool - Warringa pool in Springbrook National Park. It is supposedly a 5km round trip hike. I strapped Azalea to me and a large bag with our lunch, swimmers, and other necessities. Sakura happily trekked alongside me, and we joined a small group of friends (I only knew a couple) and their kids. It was a beautiful scenic trail with two gorgeous waterfalls. Purlingbrook falls is amazing, but you can't swim in that water because the local frogs are endangered. We continued on to Warringa pool with a fun little waterfall to jump off into the cold water below. After my girls had both been fully fed, I got some help to watch them so I could jump in. It was too cold for Sakura, but that didn't stop her from wading in the more shallow water above the waterfall. Sakura especially loved climbing the rocks which posed a bit of a challenge for me while holding Azalea. According to a companion's Strava records, it was a 9km trip. All things considered, Sakura did exceptionally well. Hayden, one of the group, was an awesome support and eventually convinced Sakura to let him carry her over some mud that was bothering her. Later she had a few more quiet tantrums, and he kept her energy going or carried her, so we didn't get too far behind the group. It was a wonderful way to spend the day, and I'm just sad Matt had to miss it. It was probably too long to do by myself with Sakura, but definitely doable in a group. I felt bad that we split into two groups because Sakura's little legs just can't go as fast as older kids.





Purlingbrook Falls



I am so thankful to have wonderful friends that have varied interests, so I can get out and about! Australia is a wonderful and beautiful place to live in!